When I started blogging back the first part of the year it was fun to sit here and come up with witty things to say about my family, job and other insane parts of my life.
Then Mr. Wonderful got laid of work.
What a bubble buster.
This was the second time in less than a year. The first time was bad enough, but twice? Did I mention we are both up in years...past the 55 year mark and progressing each day?
I hated the job he had. Self centered, egotistical, demeaning jack ass he worked for. Hubby came home every day, feeling like the high school kid who gets bullied every day and that is just WRONG at any age. So when he got laid, which while being deeply disappointed, I was happy inside because I hated seeing my wonderful husband like that.
Fast forward to mid August. Still no job.
The last five months have been tough. Hubby thought finding a job would be easy. He has incredible experience, is meticulous in what he does and how he does it. He renovated our entire house. Perfectly.
As each job came with a "Oh you came in second", then would put out another ad two weeks later and wouldn't respond to calls, or they paid minimum wage for skilled work, I could see him sink into a deeper depression. We finally decided it was age. Oh yea right. there is NO age discrimination. Bullshit!!
They can't say that's why you weren't hired, but there certainly is discrimination
I need to be honest with you though. If I was a business owner in my 30's, had job applicants from 20 to 60, thought about the future of my business and it's growth, I might choose the person between 30 and 40 because he could be with me longer. Again is it right? Hell no, but it makes sense. Illegal? Yes, but prove it.
What a shame. My husband could spend 10 years sharing his experience with the younger guys and they would be better for it. Maybe 15 years. Does he have 20 in him? Not sure, but what a shame no one took the chance and found out.
So now he is starting up a "Handyman Business" It will take time to build a reputation but he can do thsi and do it well.
I've watched him work. He's a man who does things right. Not like my ex who was a master of bubble gum and rubber bands, who could "rig" anything. No, David does it right.
So it's time for the pity pot to be gone, to support my husband in this endeavor and be his support.
If you need a great handyman for odd jobs, bathroom and kitchen renovation and many other things, you can check out his website at
http://www.ddhandymanokc.com/
Have a blessed day, Debi
Friday, August 17, 2012
Monday, August 6, 2012
A Not So Perfect Mom
As a mom we try to be perfect. need something? I have it!! Lose something? I know exactly where it is? I keep records, I have all the info on birth, SS Cards, school info..I am perfect!! I have it.
So a few weeks ago my teenage son is applying for jobs. His dad and I are divorced and I am positive, I have given his dad his actual, absolute, without a doubt, yesireeman it IS the original SS Card quite awhile ago when he needed it for something else.
Son applies for the wonderful jobs that many teens end up with, Fast Food.
YES!! He has the job. All of this being transmitted between ex-husband and myself. He goes to fill out the papers and they tell him his Social Security card is wrong. NO it's not!! I'm the mom. I know. I gave his dad the original a while back. I did. I swear. After a couple trips the the McD's and numerous conversations with my ex, and me trying to figure out what could possible be wrong
This goes on for two weeks. Mind you at no time during this do I see the card he is using. My perfect mom brain just tells me it's nuts. Final answer from the almost employer is you need to go to the Social Secuity office. Oh my. Anyone been there? Stand, or sit or squat for several hours before they call your number?
My ex was so confused as to what has been going on ( which you will see why) so I said I'd take our son on my day off to the office.
As I was sitting here dreading the day ahead, I decided to go to the SS office website. ahha!! I can make an appointment. Knowing what can transpire on a phone with a government agency I decide to have all available papers sitting in front of me before I called. It's 7 Am. No teenager in his right mind is awake at this time, so I crept into his room, awakened him enough to ask for his SS Card. What he handed me was NOT his original card. It was a faded out copy of the original.
I had fallen off of my pedestal. I knew the second that cheap copy paper slid into my hand it was not the card he had needed. I slunk out of his room as he fell back asleep and started the hunt for the original. Apparently I am not as organized as I thought.
We have a safe in which we keep all of our important papers. Each famly member has a manilla enveolpe with thier name on it with every important paper nestled inside. I had gone through my son's envelope three times. I decided it had fallen out, so I stood on my head ( safe is on the floor) and pulled everything out. My son has two envelopes. What??
Oops. Big oops. There inside the second envelope is the original Social Security card. When it is in my hand memories come rushing back to me. I gave my ex a copy because I did that with all my kids. Teens lose thing so easily. So perfect mom here will hold onto the original until needed. Because my ex told me he had to "cut" it out, I assumed he had the original. He even had the part of paper left over that it had been cut out with.
So I must now fess up to my ex what I did. That for two weeks and all the hassle with the" employer to be" who had to think my ex is nuts ( which he sometimes is), it is my fault.
It was hard enough telling my son.
What a day I have ahead of me.
So a few weeks ago my teenage son is applying for jobs. His dad and I are divorced and I am positive, I have given his dad his actual, absolute, without a doubt, yesireeman it IS the original SS Card quite awhile ago when he needed it for something else.
Son applies for the wonderful jobs that many teens end up with, Fast Food.
YES!! He has the job. All of this being transmitted between ex-husband and myself. He goes to fill out the papers and they tell him his Social Security card is wrong. NO it's not!! I'm the mom. I know. I gave his dad the original a while back. I did. I swear. After a couple trips the the McD's and numerous conversations with my ex, and me trying to figure out what could possible be wrong
This goes on for two weeks. Mind you at no time during this do I see the card he is using. My perfect mom brain just tells me it's nuts. Final answer from the almost employer is you need to go to the Social Secuity office. Oh my. Anyone been there? Stand, or sit or squat for several hours before they call your number?
My ex was so confused as to what has been going on ( which you will see why) so I said I'd take our son on my day off to the office.
As I was sitting here dreading the day ahead, I decided to go to the SS office website. ahha!! I can make an appointment. Knowing what can transpire on a phone with a government agency I decide to have all available papers sitting in front of me before I called. It's 7 Am. No teenager in his right mind is awake at this time, so I crept into his room, awakened him enough to ask for his SS Card. What he handed me was NOT his original card. It was a faded out copy of the original.
I had fallen off of my pedestal. I knew the second that cheap copy paper slid into my hand it was not the card he had needed. I slunk out of his room as he fell back asleep and started the hunt for the original. Apparently I am not as organized as I thought.
We have a safe in which we keep all of our important papers. Each famly member has a manilla enveolpe with thier name on it with every important paper nestled inside. I had gone through my son's envelope three times. I decided it had fallen out, so I stood on my head ( safe is on the floor) and pulled everything out. My son has two envelopes. What??
Oops. Big oops. There inside the second envelope is the original Social Security card. When it is in my hand memories come rushing back to me. I gave my ex a copy because I did that with all my kids. Teens lose thing so easily. So perfect mom here will hold onto the original until needed. Because my ex told me he had to "cut" it out, I assumed he had the original. He even had the part of paper left over that it had been cut out with.
So I must now fess up to my ex what I did. That for two weeks and all the hassle with the" employer to be" who had to think my ex is nuts ( which he sometimes is), it is my fault.
It was hard enough telling my son.
What a day I have ahead of me.
Sunday, August 5, 2012
Back with Maxi Stories
When I started this blog I had such good intentions of sitting here every morning and spending a few moments writing my thoughts and sharing some of the crazy things that happen in our lives. Amazing how that got flushed down the toilet. I see I still have one amazing follower. Myself. Well if anyone is going to follow me, it should be me. Other wise it could get a bit weird if I wasn't around.
So here I go again...off on a "Wild Hair"
The salon I own in the metropolitan city, is not huge. Small but comfortable. I love it. We're like the modern day "Steel Magnolias" You never know what's coming out of anyone.
This week I was shown something I never thought I would have been shown.
My clients Maxi pad. Not used, thank God, but shown.
We will call her "Susie" Susie is about 50, from what we can ascertain, has some pretty wild nights with the men and her luck is pretty bad. I can remember two dates she has had in the last 18 months who have taken her financially. We do hear more that we really want to, but being the nice people we are, we just nod and allow her to continue.
Both Ashley and I do her hair. She's a bit more more reserved when with me..I must be the motherly type..but when she is in Ashley's chair???? Poor Ashley.
One of the things "Susie" complains about is how she seems to most always be on her period when she has a hot and heavy night planned. She was in my chair this week as she was complaining about how heavy her period is. What comes out of her purse for all to see? Her giant , super absorbant, extra long Maxi Pad. We got a full detail description of how it fills up, leaks out and how many she has to carry around with her.
What happened to good old fashioned gossip??? Have a blessed day.
Saturday, February 18, 2012
Teens and teachers
I have an almost 16 year old son, Shawn. Shawn is bright, articulate and a typical smart ass kid. But he is mine, I love him and when he is messed with I get ticked.
Shawn has a Spanish teacher. They do not like each other, Unfortunately for the teacher, that means Shawn will be defiant with her, which I have tried to explain is not a wise decision. He's received some pretty bad grades in her class, which causes part of his arm to disappear for a while. His phone.
When reality kicks in and he gets his rear in gear and starts getting A's again, because he really would like to have his attachment back, she in turn, takes a very long time to post his grades.
The parent portal is the best invention ever for helping parents see their kids grades on a daily basis. We can see the grade average, the daily assignments and comments from the teachers. Love it!!
Yet when a teacher doesn't post a grade for a week, in my opinion because she doesn't like my son and I told her once that he loses his phone when his grades are low, I believe she is holding them back.
Now that's messing with my kid.
I admire teachers. My step daughter is a high school science teacher. I think they underpaid and over worked and all the time they spend at home working is not included in pay. Just don't jack with my son's grades. If he screws up, he pays for it, but when he does well, it needs to be acknowledged.
So Mrs. Barbara Culbertson? Please post my son's grades.
Shawn has a Spanish teacher. They do not like each other, Unfortunately for the teacher, that means Shawn will be defiant with her, which I have tried to explain is not a wise decision. He's received some pretty bad grades in her class, which causes part of his arm to disappear for a while. His phone.
When reality kicks in and he gets his rear in gear and starts getting A's again, because he really would like to have his attachment back, she in turn, takes a very long time to post his grades.
The parent portal is the best invention ever for helping parents see their kids grades on a daily basis. We can see the grade average, the daily assignments and comments from the teachers. Love it!!
Yet when a teacher doesn't post a grade for a week, in my opinion because she doesn't like my son and I told her once that he loses his phone when his grades are low, I believe she is holding them back.
Now that's messing with my kid.
I admire teachers. My step daughter is a high school science teacher. I think they underpaid and over worked and all the time they spend at home working is not included in pay. Just don't jack with my son's grades. If he screws up, he pays for it, but when he does well, it needs to be acknowledged.
So Mrs. Barbara Culbertson? Please post my son's grades.
Friday, January 27, 2012
A Makeover Defines Beauty
When you stand behind a chair for over 25 years you see beauty differently.
When I first started I just wanted to do young, stylish clients who would only wear the latest styles and allow me to be my most creative. I still love doing clients like that but I've leaned that they are not the most important anymore. I'll leave that to the younger stylists.
I love it when someone who has never felt pretty about herself sits in my chair. One who is far from "perfect". One who has many flaws. It's not easy. usually these women have beat themselves down for years and never get a chance to feel good just about themselves.
As a hairstlist we should hold a second degree in Psychology. We listen all the time to our clients. We sense when they have been abused, or they share with us their unhappy relationships, how they don't feel loved. A good stylist learns that the best conversation is to listen.
These are the ones I want to make "beautiful" The midle aged woman who spent 15 years raising children, never spending a dime on herself, looks frumpy, sits slump shouldered. She is my favorite.
Nothing and I emphasize NOTHING feels as good s when your clients eyes light up and you know you have made her day. It may be something as simple as as a natural color, a easy to care for hairstyle, I may have given her a paraffin dip and massaged her hands while she was processing, handed her coffeee, brought her magazines. For a couple hours I was able to make her feel pampered and good about herself.
The pictures below are of a client I did last year. You will see below the transformation.
When I first started I just wanted to do young, stylish clients who would only wear the latest styles and allow me to be my most creative. I still love doing clients like that but I've leaned that they are not the most important anymore. I'll leave that to the younger stylists.
I love it when someone who has never felt pretty about herself sits in my chair. One who is far from "perfect". One who has many flaws. It's not easy. usually these women have beat themselves down for years and never get a chance to feel good just about themselves.
As a hairstlist we should hold a second degree in Psychology. We listen all the time to our clients. We sense when they have been abused, or they share with us their unhappy relationships, how they don't feel loved. A good stylist learns that the best conversation is to listen.
These are the ones I want to make "beautiful" The midle aged woman who spent 15 years raising children, never spending a dime on herself, looks frumpy, sits slump shouldered. She is my favorite.
Nothing and I emphasize NOTHING feels as good s when your clients eyes light up and you know you have made her day. It may be something as simple as as a natural color, a easy to care for hairstyle, I may have given her a paraffin dip and massaged her hands while she was processing, handed her coffeee, brought her magazines. For a couple hours I was able to make her feel pampered and good about herself.
The pictures below are of a client I did last year. You will see below the transformation.
 |
| Kimberly fit the bill. Battleing cancer and feeling bad about herself she came to the salon for a makeover. |
 |
| Kimberly after her makeover. She beamed and we were so happy for her. |
This is what I enjoy more than anything. Changing someone that one and making them beautiful. Life is good.
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Golden Globes ARE for hairstyles and gowns
 |
| Charlize Theron, soft waves and headband |
When my stylists tell me they aren't sure of the new trends for proms and wedding I ask if they have watched the award shows. They will know then. As with this year, deep waves, shiny hair, not s many highlights, deep rich colors are the most popular.
 |
| Nicole Richie, timeless ponytail |
With as much seriousness as that man can muster he replied " You know, people really watch this for the hair and gowns, not for what it's about" I think my reply was simply "Really"? I then pointed to myself and said "Honey? That's why I watch it, I'm a hairsylist, I love the hair and the gowns. This show we are watching right now at this moment is the PRE show, where they do nothing but show that" He simply stated back "Oh"
Do I really care who won Best Director?? Not really. I want to see the new stayles, what the dresses look like, observe with my analytical mind the bad dresses and bad hairstyles. This is the precursor to the Oscars where I watch it for the same reason, although hopefully by the time they come out I will actually know what the movies are. At the Golden Globes many have not been released locally.
In all my years as a stylist, formal styles have been my favorite. Come on wedding and proms. I love them.
Can't wait for the Academy Awards to see who is wearing what. Mr. Wonderful will be peeking over his glasses.
Have a wonderful day,
DS
Friday, January 13, 2012
Teen Mistakes
Both of my boys are adopted. Erik, my oldest at 27 soon to be 28, was a tough kid to raise. When a child is adopted at an older age ( Erik was 6) their entire personlaities are already formed. You just pray you can guide them through life with a good understanding of what is right, what is wrong, what is moral and so on. Erik took a long way around, but has become a wonderful man.
Shawn is 15. Shawn will be 16 in April. I was hoping he wouldn't become a "teenager" as we all know most of them, but sighhhhhh, he did. There are days he talks, days he grumbles through them, days I want to choke him and days I want to hug him ( only if his friends aren't around because you know, not cool.)
I'm sure the looks from him must mean I have three horns growing from my head, but I believe it's mainly I'm an adult and he isn't, we don't live anywhere near the same planets, therefor I am the alien.
I've committed to getting him through these years and not losing my mind. There are days I am not sure where it is located, ( my mind that is) but I know I haven't lost it, just mislocated it.
Due to a really bad decision on his part, he won't get his license until he is 18. My heart sinks when I think of how this should be the time when he is practicing and in a few months he would leave in the car for the first time himself. I would be praying each time he left the house that if he has an accident, it be minor. Sadly, that won't happen for him and I am going to miss that time. I am wonderfing how if will affect him when all of his friends have their licenses and he does not. I can't say I'll miss the times he breaks curfew and is in a car, but there is something about the years our kids go through at this age, that even though we have a hard time with it, it's passage into adulthood. The mistake he made, the bad decision, will be with him for a long time, It will take away a lot of what he should be going through the next two years. Hopefully it will make him a better man.
In the meantime, he will still be surly, moody, gripey, slouchy and a teen. That would have happened anyways. I love him.
Shawn is 15. Shawn will be 16 in April. I was hoping he wouldn't become a "teenager" as we all know most of them, but sighhhhhh, he did. There are days he talks, days he grumbles through them, days I want to choke him and days I want to hug him ( only if his friends aren't around because you know, not cool.)
I'm sure the looks from him must mean I have three horns growing from my head, but I believe it's mainly I'm an adult and he isn't, we don't live anywhere near the same planets, therefor I am the alien.
I've committed to getting him through these years and not losing my mind. There are days I am not sure where it is located, ( my mind that is) but I know I haven't lost it, just mislocated it.
Due to a really bad decision on his part, he won't get his license until he is 18. My heart sinks when I think of how this should be the time when he is practicing and in a few months he would leave in the car for the first time himself. I would be praying each time he left the house that if he has an accident, it be minor. Sadly, that won't happen for him and I am going to miss that time. I am wonderfing how if will affect him when all of his friends have their licenses and he does not. I can't say I'll miss the times he breaks curfew and is in a car, but there is something about the years our kids go through at this age, that even though we have a hard time with it, it's passage into adulthood. The mistake he made, the bad decision, will be with him for a long time, It will take away a lot of what he should be going through the next two years. Hopefully it will make him a better man.
In the meantime, he will still be surly, moody, gripey, slouchy and a teen. That would have happened anyways. I love him.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)